This has been on my mind, heart and soul for the last few days.
This nagging thought or feeling that I’m letting people down, failing at the smallest tasks and literally just NOT doing enough, which translates into not being enough!
If you’re a mama or a wife, you just related to those words more than you’d like to admit.
My house isn’t clean enough. My kids didn’t spend enough time learning about nature. My husband didn’t get enough of my attention this week. My kids aren’t learning enough. Translation. I am not enough. We see every flaw and every nuisance, but we don’t tend to see the highlights, or even realize that some of the highlights are in our inadequacies.
This past week was tough. I felt like their wasn’t enough of me to go around. I have a small business, my husband has his, we have two small kids that we homeschool, I’m 7 months pregnant and I have two giant dogs that love to add some flare to my life. So between sleepless nights, and squeezing every ounce out of my days, I was just done. As I went upstairs to tuck my kids into bed, I found their rooms destroyed, you know the rooms that I helped clean yesterday. I LOST IT.
Tears, yelling and me throwing my hands in the air, and saying “THATS IT, I’M DONE.”
Ever had those days? The ones that you are embarrassed to parade on Facebook or Instagram?
I ended up downstairs, in tears with a husband who just swooped me up and gave me a hug. He looked at me and said “You are doing more than enough.”
Cue the “aw so sweet!”, and he is at that. I’m blessed to have a caring husband, who notices what I do everyday. BUT, I still walked away feeling less than. I’m just not doing ENOUGH well .
I listened to the lies all day long. “You aren’t doing enough with your kids”, “They aren’t learning enough”, “ Your house isn’t clean enough, or even nice enough!”, “You aren’t getting enough work done in your business.”. Meanwhile I’m buying it, not just BUYING it, but putting stock in those words. It tortured me all day, stressed me out, and flat out put a damper on my day and attitude.
How easily we will just buy into a lie, or fall into a comparison game because the lady next door looks more put together and her kid can figure out calculus at four, and yes that’s a made up story. But, the comparison game isn’t, and the torture that comes with it, that isn’t made up either.
Let me just encourage you with these words, you are more than enough. You are doing more than enough WELL. Your kids are thriving. Your husband is fine. Your house is just an object, and will be there the next day.
In words that have been poured into my spirit this week “just give them me”. It means slowing down, taking a deep breath, and realizing that He is what matters. His burden is light. His yoke is easy. He is more than enough for YOU, and he is capable of bringing life back into focus!
The enemy will use your greatest joys and your crappiest days to derail you. Be wise, my friend. Your Heavenly Father has more for you than that, and anything else other than His loving thoughts is a lie. Can we always be and do more, sure. But, it shouldn’t come with discouragement or fear that you are not enough. It should come with challenging and motivating thoughts!
So, take some time to just breathe in His goodness. In your weakness He can show you strength that only comes from Him. He will remind your heart, mind and soul that you are ENOUGH, because He gave it all for you. Everything else can and will fade away, but He is everlasting!
Until next time,
Becca